As a young know-it-all early in my mortgage banking career, the President of the company where I worked would often suggest that I liked being “right.” And he would ask, “Do you want to be dead right or alive right.” I’m not sure that I cared either way, as long as I was right. 

I’ve recently observed others doing what I did in my 20’s, causing me to wonder what the “need to be right” is all about.

My educated guess is that it’s about ego, low self-esteem and self-worth, over-coming past slights, hurts and other unresolved issues. Looking back to when I was most active as a “righter,” that was all true.

My friend Craig Elias, Founder of SHIFT Selling, Inc., observed recently that, “We can be right or we can be rich (successful), but we can’t be both.” That’s exactly what my boss was asking back then.

Today, I’m interested in being successful, even though my ego still tempts me to be right.

If you find yourself choosing “right” over “rich” and want to change that, try asking more questions and opening yourself to the ideas and suggestions of others.

Letting go of the need to be right doesn’t make you wrong.  It reveals things you’ve probably not considered, which gives you more options, improves your decisions and leads to greater success than what being right makes possible.

Once again, I was asked to respond to a question posed by readers of the Career Builder section of the Arizona Republic newspaper, in a column known as “Ask The Experts.” Following is a recent Q&A from that column, which was published in the Business Gazette:

Question:

Over the past six month, I’ve attended dozens of networking events in the hope of jump-starting my job search.  Now, I’ve been out of work nearly a year and am in need of real, immediate help. How can I turn simple networking into networking/job opportunities? 

Answer:

Successful job networking is a lot like ordering lunch. Picture yourself in a deli staring at the menu board as you are asked, “What would you like?” If you know what you want, you order it; eat it, and then go on with your day. But let’s say that you have no idea what you want. Regardless of how long you stare at the menu, you are likely to go hungry.
 
Networking is no different. People are willing to help you, but you make it difficult when you can’t tell them how. In a job search you need two things - information and contacts. Networking can get you both if you’re willing to ask for help, as well as give it in return. Before you attend a networking meeting or event, clearly understand your purpose. Make it easy for people to give you exactly what you need - a contact lead or referral.