Posted below is a copy of “Thursday’s Thought”which is distributed by my friend Grant Helgeson, at Westland Properties Group (www.westland-properties.com). It’s so good, I had to share it here. 

If you really want to live your life to the fullest and realize your greatest potential, you must be willing to run the risk of making some people mad.  Whenever you move beyond someone’s opinion of you, they get upset because you thought more of yourself than they thought of you.  If you want to know just how much you can do, how far you can reach, how much you can stretch, you must be willing to leave some people behind.  You must be willing to do more, be more and have more than those in your present company have.  This does not mean you should compare yourself to them.  It means that you must be willing to step out on your own, try life for yourself and claim your divine inheritance without guilt.  If you really want to know who you are and what you are capable of achieving, you must be willing to live without the opinions of other people.  That means you don’t ask for opinions!  And when they are offered, you need not accept them.  In order to find your identity, your authenticity and a true sense of wholeness, you must develop your individuality from the wealth of information that comes from within you.  Of course others around you can give you effective feedback.  But you need not make it your gospel.  People may not like what you do, people may not like how you do it, but these people are not living your life.  You are!  Until you are willing to live beyond the opinions of other people, and without the company of other people, you will have no idea of what your life is all about.

You may have been holding on to other people’s opinions about you and doing your best to keep people with you and on your side.  Tell someone you do not agree with their opinion of you.  Then jump into the center of your own life and get comfortable being there!

“Complaint is a door that closes opportunity.”

Do you ever notice those people who tend to complain about everything, also tend to have lots of problems in their life? I suggest that their “problems” are a product of their complaints; not the other way around.

Although I’m sometimes tempted to complain about things, I recognize that any form of judgment, criticism or complaint serves only to block what is possible. I prefer to stand back and observe; letting things happen.

I’m a proponent of affirmations. They help me stay focused on a positive and forward-thinking mindset. One of my more recent affirmations is – “I tell myself the truth in all areas of my life.”

Affirmations can “affirm” present truths, or things to which we aspire. The irony in this affirmation is that it’s not always “true.”  In this case I accept progress, and shoot for perfection.

Why is this affirmation important? We all have a tendency to lie to ourselves – often. One of the ways we use lies is to convince ourselves to settle for less than what is possible. We sell ourselves short – physically, spiritually, emotionally and intellectually. That’s not ok with me, so I search myself daily for areas where I can improve. 

What are you lying to yourself about? Are you settling for less than what you know is possible?  If so, just quit lying!

As a young know-it-all early in my mortgage banking career, the President of the company where I worked would often suggest that I liked being “right.” And he would ask, “Do you want to be dead right or alive right.” I’m not sure that I cared either way, as long as I was right. 

I’ve recently observed others doing what I did in my 20’s, causing me to wonder what the “need to be right” is all about.

My educated guess is that it’s about ego, low self-esteem and self-worth, over-coming past slights, hurts and other unresolved issues. Looking back to when I was most active as a “righter,” that was all true.

My friend Craig Elias, Founder of SHIFT Selling, Inc., observed recently that, “We can be right or we can be rich (successful), but we can’t be both.” That’s exactly what my boss was asking back then.

Today, I’m interested in being successful, even though my ego still tempts me to be right.

If you find yourself choosing “right” over “rich” and want to change that, try asking more questions and opening yourself to the ideas and suggestions of others.

Letting go of the need to be right doesn’t make you wrong.  It reveals things you’ve probably not considered, which gives you more options, improves your decisions and leads to greater success than what being right makes possible.

Once again, I was asked to respond to a question posed by readers of the Career Builder section of the Arizona Republic newspaper, in a column known as “Ask The Experts.” Following is a recent Q&A from that column, which was published in the Business Gazette:

Question:

Over the past six month, I’ve attended dozens of networking events in the hope of jump-starting my job search.  Now, I’ve been out of work nearly a year and am in need of real, immediate help. How can I turn simple networking into networking/job opportunities? 

Answer:

Successful job networking is a lot like ordering lunch. Picture yourself in a deli staring at the menu board as you are asked, “What would you like?” If you know what you want, you order it; eat it, and then go on with your day. But let’s say that you have no idea what you want. Regardless of how long you stare at the menu, you are likely to go hungry.
 
Networking is no different. People are willing to help you, but you make it difficult when you can’t tell them how. In a job search you need two things – information and contacts. Networking can get you both if you’re willing to ask for help, as well as give it in return. Before you attend a networking meeting or event, clearly understand your purpose. Make it easy for people to give you exactly what you need – a contact lead or referral.